When the words “Toxicity of desire” are used to form such a phrase the assumption is desire is toxic. But when desire is spoken of as a necessity in the mending of success stories you must best be questioning: How to change desire into positivity.
Toxicity of desire: Lessons from normal humans at the clinic and a hyena in the jungle.
My second dose of vaccine came on September 13, 2021. On this day I and other tens and tens of people at the clinic offended their reason of existence. It was a kid suffering from a malnutrition condition at the clinic which everyone ignored. His mother had to stand in the queue with us and behind much of us. Yet we were not ill.
It was the desire of anyone visiting the clinic to get all his/her issues solved earlier and leave. After all, spending hours at the clinic waiting for a jab that is two weeks overdue is not desirable. The woman and her malnutrition kid had to first pass through the temperature tests, and everyone including all of us who were healthy and had visited to get a jab had to. The temperature test process wasn’t anything to consume more than five minutes. But none allowed the kid a slot ahead of him/her. Excuses ranged from “I left my doors not locked” to “I have a visitor at my home”.
A young laughing hyena found itself the only of its kind alive in the plain. A terrible drought had hit, two years had passed without any rains until two weeks ago. For three days it rained softly and calmly as if to quench the tears of losses the wildlife had endured. But there was not much among the stocks of the living wildlife to answer to it positively as it wasn’t a guarantee of a smooth ever raining after. Calves, cubs and other offsprings, the signs were, were insignificant in numbers this year. And the surviving hyena simply had to learn to survive more by trying to hunt alone whereas hyenas are group hunters.
After the rain and floods after it, the hyena followed deposited material looking for anything to eat until it joined a pack of vultures on a carcass that was almost zero meat left. The mother to this young one had taught her that a thin layer of cartilage and the bone structure it wraps around the knee joins was the most delicious treat in the jungle. The young hyena found the front leg stripped of all the meat upon arrival and dragged it towards sloppy ground since such required her to be on a slope, on the downside of it, pin the bone with her legs while her teeth ate into it.
The vultures laughed. “Why is she ignoring the little meat left in favour of the bone, after all, we don’t eat bones.”
The meat was no match to what her mama had characterised as delicious and she would starve to death for that as she did it over and over, and day after day. With her age and the strength of her teeth taken into account, she could not eat many bones to cover up her nutritional needs. What could have saved her was not delicious but simply the meat.
The toxicity of desire or the benefit of it
Usually in this life. We are shown the fancy things and that can make us like them. We are also shown that can afford them. Already when that happens our hearts are already loving it. What we are not shown are the true costs of affording that exact thing. The bigger cost is forgetting everything else that can matter. it is Forgetting a better life you can achieve without what you have been shown and which you can afford at serious costs. As we are probably all addicted people; that’s the second thing. Addiction plays a bigger part. It helps in showing us what we can afford and while hiding the costs of affording what we can afford.
A desire is irrational. So everything that plays in the chemistry of the heart is with its tendencies to cause harm unless it’s capitalised on to produce positives. Desire is said to be essential in building success. It is also heavily involved in erasing the possibilities of success. So, if the desire is toxic, why is it a benefit of it to the few others. Ladies and gentlemen each one of us, every second, is getting the toxicity of desire or the benefit of it.
If we are allowed to describe an adult life in the context of a moving bus with its passengers. Desire would not be the wheels. Desire is the driver. Each one of us is seated in the backseat and we can’t be heard all the time when we voice at our desires. We are very unlucky that we can’t control or stop the desire as long as our wheels of life are moving. What we can do is just to use it in building the most positive things in our lives.
It can be a desire to be happy. When you desire to be happy it means without being happy you are not fulfilled. The best you can do is to allow that happiness to be out of the least instead of the most you can find. In the same manner, successful people are people who simply directed desire into a bigger vision in life instead of simply allowing it to drive recklessly.
Changing desire into positivity
A desire is the inner working of the human’s wants. It’s the need to emotionally possess, control, be in charge, or even get free and exploit. A desire is largely a terrible thing than it is a good one. Grandfather and I had time to talk about the structures build from around 700 (Great Zimbabwe) to 200 (others) years ago in Zimbabwe. A novel is quoted by some as a source to prove that the stone structures were pilled up into UNESCO-heritage-class monuments at the cost of virtually any man involved in the constructed process. Men had to roll tonnes of stones without the aid of draught power or pulleys which weren’t our thing back then. The story in the novel picked at events happening not so many decades before the colonisation. The building of a second structure resembling Great Zimbabwe happened in the context of the king who wanted a tower that would allow him to touch the moon.
The novel is wrong as a work of fiction. But it truly showed us the true nature of us humans, and the question left is how to turn that terrible monster, desire, into something positive and make our lives better and the world better places? Here is how to change desire into positivity:
- Build a vision, not plans. Construct a roadmap, don’t build a highway.
- Build layers of good habits in you life daily. With good habits there is never enough of it. You can read “Atomic Habits” by James Clear.
- Have all the detail that can matter in your life. Don’t be a stranger to yourself. Admit what you are to correct it from that point. It must not take anyone to point what you are not at par.
- Do some value analysis of the things you may want to achieve before you can go for them. It is a great deal to know the value you can give to yourself, the society and your family and the meaning of it. Some things you desire when achieved can simply subtract.
- Have a serious consideration for others. Though you can not give them your love you can give them your respect.
- Self-respect is essential in making a person. It is a clear outline of what you can allow yourself to go through, to feel, to be and be involved in.
- Don’t chase for what’s exceptionally yours. Chase for what’s rare, for something that if missed you will never get a chance to possess it. The hyena here did the opposite and ended up on the losing side.
- Put some light into your past mistakes to know if toxic desire had been ionvolved in making them. Distance a mistake from a failure for a failure is a better fellow between it and a mistake.
- Allow yourself to be wrong to be wrong to correct yourself. If you fall on the wrong side no one can imprison you for that. Judge yourself openly, and build yourself in the way.
- Build inner superiority (interiority). It can beat outter superiority (superiority) or inner weakness (inferirioty). Watch a TedTalks video where this interiority thing is coming from.
- Have the patience where it is needed not the confidence. Patience can referee your desire into proper results.