Adapting to not being understood by those you depend on.

Adapting to not being understood *Canva

 Adapting to not being understood by those you depend on.

Being misunderstood by those you have not a choice but to depend on in making your story of life can put you on the verge of extinction. Adapting can have you change that and reverse your extinction. The seeing minds kind of adapting isn’t fighting for what you want, it’s influencing people to get what you want from them or finding means to be without what you want from them.

Extract help.

If you want spiritual or financial help putting you under the most spiritually or financially successful won’t change much. You need to extract help. So that when you are given what’s meant for “this” you turn it into another direction “that”. Take things the way they are never intended to be taken to make the most positive means. If pocket money and or donated money and not much in someone’s hands stays so it will never make a greater impact than when it is taken by the beholder as “breakthrough money”.

“You have been raised badly,” said my uncle over and over. When I allowed myself to take his words as half-true instead of being offended by them, I changed myself in many aspects for the good. Every helper is with his/her own ways of helping or giving and such ways are good if you don’t take them as conditions. Extract the help.

I would later write:

The younger knows the senior is lost but he cannot revolt, because revolting is not the right way to carve up his future. The younger must play, learn so, and proceed to carve up a future favourable to him. A future that is a result of the senior’s input and his learning, and a result of him refining the senior’s input. ~SubjectMe 05Nov2020.

You should:

Never live in anyone else’s expectations. The people you depend on and your progenitors have made you. [But] they have not made what you will become. ~SubjectMe 07Aug2021.

Don’t correct them. Correct your future.

Don’t waste your time correcting the past, correct the future. You cannot change them admit that. Focus on what you’ll become not on what they’ve managed to become. To focus is to fail to stay out of yourself and, therefore, discover or rediscover yourself, not them.

The seeing minds approach encourages you to discover things not just to see them. And it’s possible to discover ways to go about it when you are the misunderstood and adapt to not being understood.

Do act. Talk zero and prove that you deserve to be understood and be given help.

Actions! Right actions can prove you right. Go into extremes in proving yourself right. It takes a lot and it doesn’t ruin you.

Maybe it’s your parents misunderstanding you and you need their help. Some adapting to not being understood is necessary. When you keep finding means to and growing when conditions are not allowing it you are only doing yourself a big favour. You are like that cactus tree (I’ve heard that in Australia cactus is an adjective and they use it to explain disorder).

Understand them.

Know what they like and what they don’t. The art of winning a war is having the best knowledge about all the things involved, including what you are fighting for, through and with.

Know what they are and what they are not and build your proper ways of dealing with them like a hostage who wants life. You can always know what to do to win their understanding and know the costs involved in winning their understanding.

Walk alone.

You stay flat about your plans. It works if the depth of their misunderstanding on what you want to become is immense. You maybe going against what is a culture but trying to come up with great achievements in life. What you can do when you pick this one is your best approach is to use it in conjunction with the extracting help approach.

The Atatürk approach.

Mustafa Kemal made an “alliance” with religious groups to have that alliance work for time he expected it to then move on to announce secularism instead of allowing religion to be the cornerstone of Turkish politics. Needless to say that he was a general, then a statesman who presided over Turkey from the post-World War settlements to 1939 and he abolished the caliph.

That approach where you stand a good sheep then change into what may be a wolf after you are enhanced by their support may be good for you as it may be selfish. Your big thing is to stay flat about your next move, because when you announce your next move before you make someone or something out of their help they surely take you down.

Tell them what they wanna hear, although what they may wanna hear may not be basically the truth.

“Are you still at the college?”

Yes!!!

But I had dropped out of college to silence the possibility of being lured into what I had thought to be a trap, the salary, then find no other means to go through it but to work towards my income through myself and finally get to believe in real bigger things in life. Keeping that lie on worked, although it’s not what I can encourage.

To them dropping out of college when you are the village’s fifth person to reach the university is a sin. But to me it was necessary. I committed the sin then kept it hidden just to look as a pure person and be what they can be willing to help.

Detach yourself from places to quickly adapt.

Maybe in your being misunderstood, you are being taken to places you don’t like, into fields of knowledge that are not necessary for you, into any terrain, physical or metaphorical, that are meaningless to you. Don’t begin by “I’m doomed!!” Begin by “What to do?” and “How to do it?”

Carpentry as an industry meant a lot in my life when I started by asking myself questions than telling myself something. It is where  I started to dream about building a big fish farming and processing industry. But I, at first, was detesting to with my uncle who is a carpenter.

Cooperate with the like others. You can find clues for your breakthrough.

By “like others” I mean people with varying knowledge and experience. If what you intend to make is all about resources, you can combine and make something bigger. Much of the things on this planet fail because they are done in competition throughout.

“Ok, Disney poured in $216 million on a movie, Lion King 2019,” I said.

“That can be enough to buy a capable cargo plane,” a friend next door and an aspiring journalist said.

“Do we need stunt schools to match the western industry one day?”

“No the West starting from around 2018, 2019 is sort of exporting a big share of its industry to Africa. And Netflix…”

Such a conversation is more enlightening to a person whose wish is to seriously end up in business and he cannot get it from a friend next door who talks about football on all occasions. (We talk about football a lot in Africa, to such an extent that a farmer may know all the transfers happening in a decade in European football instead of what a tonne of soybeans can sell for).