Motivation

That we are all going to die. The function of death.

The function of death is to limit in every sense:- demographic sense, political sense, economic sense, warring sense, etc. The fact that one day we are all going to die. It’s something likeable. Because I don’t imagine healthy earth if all ancestors were here, still living and not ageing. All ancestors: the most liberal, the most conservative, the evilest, the purest at heart, givers takers, leaders to like and leaders to hate.

Death is our friend precisely because it brings us into absolute and passionate presence with all that is here, that is natural, that is love.

Rainer Maria Rilke



Death is there to make sure that we are all goods with best before and must be busy to get her/himself to the market before the value is lost. That value is in progress and a step back each human make. It’s a value in all possibilities, bad or good. When it is bad death is there to put a break before much harm is caused. So, that we are all going to die, it’s something to like. The function of death is to break infinity into finite and, therefore, cause vanity.

Human dreams are not a good thing. Sometimes they seek to build. Sometimes they seek to ruin it all. What’re the benefits of building in thousands of years a thing you can wipe out in a second? Humans are scary. Human dreams must be stopped. There must be a ceiling to stop them. Tell’em, “well boys and girls, end here”.

Death is there to do that. Life means suffering and joy combined, both being possibilities in every second. The function of death is to stop the repetition over and over of these two. So that once restless is restful. Every road must have an ending. If there is no end there is no journey in it.

When waiting for a train. A certain thing is the timetable is the to do its work. But it works this way that for arrival to be made, a departure must happen in real-time. The same train leaving can be back again at the same spot. Death seam to bring that into the human system. I must die so that in the future a better version of me must exist to correct where I faltered. Oppression, slavery, superiority and anything that disturbed the human race if it makes sense to me, chances are it will cease to make any sense to my future and future offspring. We must die.

When we die we leave our ideas behind so that they can be a starting point for what’s left and what comes in the future.

No matter how brilliantly, successfully and terribly you write your story. The function of death is to put a conclusion. Some are unlucky they have that conclusion earlier in their lives.

What is fear? The bad or good, and overcoming it.

The Fear System

Fear.image.fear
Fear of the unknown* Informativus

What is fear? The term origins can be traced back to proto-Germanic feraz which means danger. Fær is the old English origin for middle English fere “sudden attack, calamity, danger”. Simply put, fear is a state of being afraid, after perceiving the danger that can result from avoiding or going through an experience, object, practice etc. The Christian Bible’s usage of the term fear is well-covered in this definition. Hindu writings, Bhagavad Gita being one of them, dwelled a lot on fear as well. Fear exists in the books of religion.

During the age of the internet we have seen more fears entering the English terminology. The Fear Of Missing Out (FOMO) and the Fear Of a Better Option (FOBO). People are building more ways to communicate what’s fear and help in fighting it and understanding it. Yet, according to this source, the psychological term for fear of the unknown is supposed to be xenophobia. Yet, phobia is an extension applicable to any form of hate. What you are afraid of in this fear of the unknown sense is what you are likely to hate.

How fear of the unknown forms or is created in an individual being? Well, before one creates fear in himself. He creates the unknown which result in fear. Things are so as it is said that people sometimes fear those things they do not understand. Fear combines with the lack of understanding can make hate over the things not understood.

Fear exists in our paths to greatness as an obstacle. It’s far that put brakes when you are supposed to move. This is the exact fear discussed here, the ‘bad fear’. Fear is good as it is bad. When it is bad, it sort of stays in the qualities of the good fear, respected by the host and the society. It is a system of one’s beliefs, and beliefs may subtract the need to know.

The terrible thing with this fear is it can allow you to try, take some initial steps and have you forget that those steps are progress and quit. The bad fear is the best fear to fry your progress.

Fear is the worst thing that could happen to a human. It sort of gives him some confidence to act, when it is nothing. It gets one into moving backwards eventually since it’s never eyes to see nor the guts to discover. The format fear is in is fear itself. It is the biggest obstacle in the book of success.

Bad fear is pointless. Live in it you become pointless. It attacks the centre of solution-making first, the mind. When things are so you are worse of in fear that you can be in an intensive care unit.

You can say that you are afraid of lions. That is not different from saying that you hate to dine with the lions. Fear anything you don’t specifically understand and chose not ever understand it, you can only hate it.

It’s rather better not to ever step into that ring that is in there facing an opponent filled with it. In most cases, the best fruits of fear are not victory/. Fear can leave you worse than you were when you started.

The positive sides of fear

Fear exists in our systems of belief as a correctional centre of it. You are afraid to do scam business or to hurt someone physically or emotionally. That alone keeps you a good person in society when you have more chances to be a very bad person. You are disposed to not do things against your ethics, morality, your religion or principles, the law and so on.

Fear in this case ceases to be ‘bad fear’ to become ‘good fear’.

How to win over fear

You don’t need a powerful hand. You just have to list things through it. The very step towards overcoming fear is just feeling that you are adequate. You don’t need to be overconfident, though. When you set the fire and fail to have it burn allow patience to be your jacket in the cold.

Know what you are dealing with the best you can know it. The time is always there. Don’t waste it. Once you have the knowledge apply it. The third aspect of knowledge which is not knowledge itself, not its application is knowledge of applying knowledge.

Read: Discover, don’t see things and build a proper perspective.

Fail to abuse the resources at your exposal. As for me, I didn’t watch pirated movies on the village’s first computer which I own. That’s why I am here blogging for you.

Find some source of encouragement, build a friendship that is your ultimate strengthening resource. Their words are powerful as well as their actions. Allow only those who can deliver good words and experiences that can liquidate your fear.

Failure must be a moment to learn a bigger things in your game. Don’t allow it to cause much panic. Once you fail, allow yourself to access the parts of the failure that are yours and correct them and forget the parts of that failure that were caused by someone else.

Toxicity of desire how to change desire into positivity

When the words “Toxicity of desire” are used to form such a phrase the assumption is desire is toxic. But when desire is spoken of as a necessity in the mending of success stories you must best be questioning: How to change desire into positivity.

Toxicity of desire: Lessons from normal humans at the clinic and a hyena in the jungle.

My second dose of vaccine came on September 13, 2021. On this day I and other tens and tens of people at the clinic offended their reason of existence. It was a kid suffering from a malnutrition condition at the clinic which everyone ignored. His mother had to stand in the queue with us and behind much of us. Yet we were not ill.

It was the desire of anyone visiting the clinic to get all his/her issues solved earlier and leave. After all, spending hours at the clinic waiting for a jab that is two weeks overdue is not desirable. The woman and her malnutrition kid had to first pass through the temperature tests, and everyone including all of us who were healthy and had visited to get a jab had to. The temperature test process wasn’t anything to consume more than five minutes. But none allowed the kid a slot ahead of him/her. Excuses ranged from “I left my doors not locked” to “I have a visitor at my home”.

A young laughing hyena found itself the only of its kind alive in the plain. A terrible drought had hit, two years had passed without any rains until two weeks ago. For three days it rained softly and calmly as if to quench the tears of losses the wildlife had endured. But there was not much among the stocks of the living wildlife to answer to it positively as it wasn’t a guarantee of a smooth ever raining after. Calves, cubs and other offsprings, the signs were, were insignificant in numbers this year. And the surviving hyena simply had to learn to survive more by trying to hunt alone whereas hyenas are group hunters.

After the rain and floods after it, the hyena followed deposited material looking for anything to eat until it joined a pack of vultures on a carcass that was almost zero meat left. The mother to this young one had taught her that a thin layer of cartilage and the bone structure it wraps around the knee joins was the most delicious treat in the jungle. The young hyena found the front leg stripped of all the meat upon arrival and dragged it towards sloppy ground since such required her to be on a slope, on the downside of it, pin the bone with her legs while her teeth ate into it.

The vultures laughed. “Why is she ignoring the little meat left in favour of the bone, after all, we don’t eat bones.”

The meat was no match to what her mama had characterised as delicious and she would starve to death for that as she did it over and over, and day after day. With her age and the strength of her teeth taken into account, she could not eat many bones to cover up her nutritional needs. What could have saved her was not delicious but simply the meat.

Don’t chase for what’s exceptionally yours. Chase for what’s rare, for something that if missed you will never get a chance to possess it.

Article

The toxicity of desire or the benefit of it

Usually in this life. We are shown the fancy things and that can make us like them. We are also shown that can afford them. Already when that happens our hearts are already loving it. What we are not shown are the true costs of affording that exact thing. The bigger cost is forgetting everything else that can matter. it is Forgetting a better life you can achieve without what you have been shown and which you can afford at serious costs. As we are probably all addicted people; that’s the second thing. Addiction plays a bigger part. It helps in showing us what we can afford and while hiding the costs of affording what we can afford.

A desire is irrational. So everything that plays in the chemistry of the heart is with its tendencies to cause harm unless it’s capitalised on to produce positives. Desire is said to be essential in building success. It is also heavily involved in erasing the possibilities of success. So, if the desire is toxic, why is it a benefit of it to the few others. Ladies and gentlemen each one of us, every second, is getting the toxicity of desire or the benefit of it.

If we are allowed to describe an adult life in the context of a moving bus with its passengers. Desire would not be the wheels. Desire is the driver. Each one of us is seated in the backseat and we can’t be heard all the time when we voice at our desires. We are very unlucky that we can’t control or stop the desire as long as our wheels of life are moving. What we can do is just to use it in building the most positive things in our lives.

It can be a desire to be happy. When you desire to be happy it means without being happy you are not fulfilled. The best you can do is to allow that happiness to be out of the least instead of the most you can find. In the same manner, successful people are people who simply directed desire into a bigger vision in life instead of simply allowing it to drive recklessly.

Changing desire into positivity

A desire is the inner working of the human’s wants. It’s the need to emotionally possess, control, be in charge, or even get free and exploit. A desire is largely a terrible thing than it is a good one. Grandfather and I had time to talk about the structures build from around 700 (Great Zimbabwe) to 200 (others) years ago in Zimbabwe. A novel is quoted by some as a source to prove that the stone structures were pilled up into UNESCO-heritage-class monuments at the cost of virtually any man involved in the constructed process. Men had to roll tonnes of stones without the aid of draught power or pulleys which weren’t our thing back then. The story in the novel picked at events happening not so many decades before the colonisation. The building of a second structure resembling Great Zimbabwe happened in the context of the king who wanted a tower that would allow him to touch the moon. 

The novel is wrong as a work of fiction. But it truly showed us the true nature of us humans, and the question left is how to turn that terrible monster, desire, into something positive and make our lives better and the world better places? Here is how to change desire into positivity:

  • Build a vision, not plans. Construct a roadmap, don’t build a highway.
  • Build layers of good habits in you life daily. With good habits there is never enough of it. You can read “Atomic Habits” by James Clear.
  • Have all the detail that can matter in your life. Don’t be a stranger to yourself. Admit what you are to correct it from that point. It must not take anyone to point what you are not at par.
  • Do some value analysis of the things you may want to achieve before you can go for them. It is a great deal to know the value you can give to yourself, the society and your family and the meaning of it. Some things you desire when achieved can simply subtract.
  • Have a serious consideration for others. Though you can not give them your love you can give them your respect.
  • Self-respect is essential in making a person. It is a clear outline of what you can allow yourself to go through, to feel, to be and be involved in.
  • Don’t chase for what’s exceptionally yours. Chase for what’s rare, for something that if missed you will never get a chance to possess it. The hyena here did the opposite and ended up on the losing side.
  • Put some light into your past mistakes to know if toxic desire had been ionvolved in making them. Distance a mistake from a failure for a failure is a better fellow between it and a mistake.
  • Allow yourself to be wrong to be wrong to correct yourself. If you fall on the wrong side no one can imprison you for that. Judge yourself openly, and build yourself in the way.
  • Build inner superiority (interiority). It can beat outter superiority (superiority) or inner weakness (inferirioty). Watch a TedTalks video where this interiority thing is coming from.
  • Have the patience where it is needed not the confidence. Patience can referee your desire into proper results.

Failure: What’s good advice to anyone failing?

Mickey Rooner on Failure

What’s my advice to persons who just failed?

Put your failure in your wallet. Have it there as your legal tender. It can buy something for you. Between you and your success, there is your failure.

SubjectMe, Meinrad Socien

Just because you have failed, it doesn’t mean that what you were and what you are doing is what can lead to failure.

You may not like it when you fail. But don’t hate it when you fail. The first thing is you must learn from your failure and you cannot learn from a teacher you hate. The other thing is not liking it is different from hating it.

Keep trying when you fail if your heart is telling you that you love that run you have not won yet. I would rather feel the hate in what I love than feel the love in what I hate. Feel the doom in what you love the most than promises in what your heart isn’t ticking for. One day it will come right.

Failure is not an invention. If you fail it’s not that someone invented the kind of failure you are in. Take a deeper look into you because it is you whom you must correct to come up with a machine born to succeed. The majority would rather distance themselves and put their failure somewhere far so that they can be safer from it and fail to understand it and fail to learn from it and fail again. But there are ways to bring in a failure into bringing in your success.

Success is about how many capabilities you build. When you fail it means you are some capabilities before success. To catch up you need to keep multiplying your capabilities. It’s painful such capabilities but not like watching yourself remain in that failure forever.

Related: In your journey to success, these thoughts can get you far

Apparently, if you are always right everything becomes wrong. When you fail allow it to be much more of how others solve issues between them and their partners. They just avoid being correct and admit that they are wrong. When you fail you are advised to ask yourself “what went wrong?” and “what’s my fault in this wrong?” and to choose answers to such questions that are not self-biased.

Put your failure in your wallet. Have it there as your legal tender. It can buy something for you. Between you and your success, there is your failure. Avoid not going through that bridge. You are making a serious wrong. You grow through a failure, and that type of growth is called “growing in strength“.

In the making of a failure, there is always something that you avoided you shouldn’t have avoided; something you should have avoided you didn’t; something that you missed you shouldn’t have; something you didn’t miss you should have missed.

Among winners in the major wars fought there are some losers who we say to have won the war when the losses they have made are immense. Think of it if being on the winning side doesn’t really mean you are a winner, being on the losing side is not designed to mean that you are really a loser. Lose while in your path to ultimate victory. Fail while determined to ultimately win.

Think long-term. Then work on it. Results don’t have to come yesterday or today or even tomorrow. It’s possible to win the game with consistency and patience being your both arms that with confidence and endowment being your footstool.

If you are playing the game and losing over and over, it may mean that you haven’t tried to play it in your own game. Give yourself a position and an environment that can allow you to strike a difference.

Build good habits and put formality in them. So that it can cease to be just making sure that when you are an author writing 300 words when you wake up is the first thing to do but writing them on a perfect desk instead of your bed is the first to do. We are all habitual beings. A good habit system keeps us on the good side of what we are (habitual). Formality gets us to respect what we are (habitual) and what we aspire to be through the habits.

Focus. Live like a normal person with an abnormal purpose on the planet. Allow your body to rest and feed it well, and if you respect it it can work for you without a flaw. A failure is not the end of it all. It may be a new twist to the story, a story that relies on the script you write.

The illusion of good life is living in credit.

The illusion of good life is a costful life and an enemy to success

The life you want, if I give it to you now, you can live the worst you can in your future. And I will not give you that!

My uncle, when he said this, meant that the quality and quantities of meals I desired and the care I longed to be given were expensive, and would not be achieved at once with what he was delivering then. Yes, we had the worst meals in the neighbourhood, but that care and quality I desired in my life and my meals, respectively, was an illusion of good life. He meant that affording what we can afford is never wrong. But we mostly do so at a scale of costs that are fatal in the books of either our success or our true happiness and satisfaction.

I didn’t see that the cheaper meals, and my going for a month without having tasted meat, among other things, allowed much to be left in the hands of the provider, my uncle. Left with a bit more the selfless provider would move on to pump money into our pockets after each gig I and other boys performed as assistant roofing carpenters. That money wasn’t really a lot but it was much to us. As for me, it was a big step ahead.

We mostly live at a credit. We would rather live at a credit than have the least we don’t heavily pay for and then go on to make the most with the least.

Cheaper meals are the least. But they guaranteed a $40 payout instead of $5 per contract. A $40 payout helped to put my imagination into a vision.

Quickly I learned, you can easily buy your misery back if you choose to have the most that your income can’t afford at zero credit. “Credit” in this usage here does not translate to debt. It is our potential we sell away through the illusion of buying some good life.

The things you get free in this life when others are paying properly and waiting for the right time to be able to enjoy them are what you pay for with your life. If not your life it must be your chances of succeeding in this life.

Why things are as in the statement above?

The system in this world is one paying. Anyone of us may be smarter in any sense. To get whatever s/he can get free. But s/he can pay for what s/he doesn’t pay for with his/her chances of seeing greater things in life.

It is cheaper to be the least you can be. Because in being that you can make the most. If you can add things like a vision in building your life, the “least path” can always leave you with the most to put into your vision.

In most cases, we think success is driven by a few things. I believe that patience and all other few items are all you can have. Someone else can say it’s desire. But the true thing is success comes through being a high-performance person in as many components, mentalities, aspects and practices that drives it.

In your journey to success, these thoughts can get you far.

Quick thoughts to get you by in your journey to success.

We are accustomed to thinking that success and greatness are achieved through hard work. That is never wrong when success is defined as how you fare in a competition setup. A hard worker can be anyone among us. But hardworking is scarcely rewarding alone.

That’s why there should be hard thinking, too. Hard thinking, thinking that becomes a personal philosophy with not only escape routes but fighting styles, when combined with moderate working and sleepful nights can bring goodies into our lives. 

Work must cease to be hard work to become a working work. When you can’t conquer, you find means to do that. By default we are all bound to fail. The way to change this is you and not anyone. You are the one to tweak original you into someone who is but to be successful. The inner invincibility beats the outer invincibility. Have it developing in you.

I don’t wish to see success coming during the first try. Success must remain harder to attain so that it can only remain success that is for those who deserve it. For success is proof that you really wanted it and it had to happen. It is also success again to have the best version of happiness in your hands that others don’t.

Success is not hardworking as they say. It may be the depth of the tweaking you do to what’s the default. In this world, we are sometimes taught to remain into what’s default to help build success for others.

Sometimes you need to retire out of the competition and simply beat them. In a big company, to succeed you are expected to have five PhDs, one or two achievements in other companies. Behind you, there must be hints of hard work as expected ahead. Does this all mean without having the brilliance and the chance to earn the PhDs you can not achieve?

Break out of thinking cycles to create a line that shoots up in a straight line that grows up. New forms of doing it can make doing the same thing a big difference. People who can’t qualify to be CEOs are people who own the production line, so they simply declared themselves CEOs out of what they came up with. They faced struggles but they couldn’t be brave enough to keep facing failure forever.

The world always existed before you were there. If you think you are born early. Well! Some thinking is always there earlier for you to only take it as your thinking. The world has been influenced in your absence. Where you find it disagreeing with you. Do fight it. Influence it. Don’t hesitate to influence the world. Because in your absence the worst can influence it and keep turning it into a bad place.

Don’t do a business. Do your business. Don’t plan. Build a vision. Don’t travel. Construct a roadmap. Don’t desire to be successful. Build your own definition of success and live in it. After that erase the definition when it’s limiting.

Any definition is good except when it’s in place to defeat the freedoms of other beings.

There may be things to avoid in life. You are taught about them in life, growing up, at school and at home. It’s fifty-fifty. But most of the time instead of being taught to avoid you are taught to hate.

Hate spreads over. Spills into other related things. With hate, there s no ‘do it your own way’ you just hate. With avoiding you can avoid it your own way. Some successful people in the world of tech including in the addicting gaming industry didn’t have to hate the screen as it is a time waster to be detested. They avoided what they avoided on the screen in their own ways and allowed their success to come through the same screen.

In other words, don’t know what to hate. Know what to avoid.

After all, it’s better to be a victim of falling in love than a victim of hate.  For a victim of hating something not really negative is always a victim.

So, don’t say “I really hate it” as it is invincible to say “I don’t like it very much” — because in the latter there is room to change.

Most people who get their freedom fail to utilise it. If you don’t have the freedom you are just unlucky. That’s why you must create that freedom. You must waste no time fighting for very unnecessary freedoms, just influence things to get it.

Allow ambition to be what you balance on not what you move by.

Intoxicating? This is how to deal with digital addiction

It’s hard to imagine how each day new things to drawn us into digital addiction on the tech front are showing up. The pressure is massive we can’t hold the line. The question is how exactly can each one of us deal with that problem. It can be prevented. It can be cured. When these two approached can’t work or can’t prove worthy, digital addiction can be turned into a profit. A serious profit.

Preventing digital addiction

Prevention is avoidance. Avoidance is abstinence. Abstinence is like conservatism. It can work as it cannot work always.

Prevention is having that smartphone and allow it to be there untouched, except when necessary. Through it, you can avoid other pieces of tech and be ok with it. You can gain your time and part of your time that others count on for their happiness.

For it to work you are expected to be aware that:

  • Addiction can be addiction on anything.
  • There is always the helpful side of anything “terribly bad”. You can create a social account and advertise through it. As someone creates one, borrow a loan to buy the services of the best photographer in the town who can help with good photos that can win personal likes and nothing else.
  • Where these is addiction there are promises of profits as well as those of big losses.
  • Of all the forms of addiction existing in this world, digital addiction is the most complex. We can go for three hours in the Candy Crushing Saga and think of anyone else on the same screen doing something else as addicted. The things is, there are millions of addiction on one screen or control. Some may be helpful. I heard that someone quitted smoking by switching to PlayStation.
  • There are many things you can do to be free while not preventing your presence in what digitally addicts. There is one thing you can do when you simply prevent yourself. Preventing.
  • Keep yourself an owner of budget tech since by your preventing much of you are an average user. This can help you in preventing unnecessary spending.

If you belong to the prevention faction you don’t pick up the digital side of things as a quick fix to the needs of your leisure time. “Oh, I have been studying hard. So, after exams, I will spend hours gaming.” This is not good for you.

Every form of addiction is bad no matter whether the narcotic be alcoholic or morphine or idealism

Carl Gustav Jung, Memories, Dream, Reflections

Curing digital addiction

Basing on my experience I give you my eight points.

  1. Just when you need to be there the most. Accepting defeat works. You must act as if you are accepting defeat. This goes for adult sides and addicting games or spaces online. Right in the middle of your writing an assignment you can find yourself stuck in one tab. Close it without hesitation as if you are accepting defeat. Walk away when you need to play the most. “I am leaving this game without a win. Without my satisfaction achieved.”
  2. Allow your digital world to be governed by your world of good habits. If doing you bed just as your feet land of the floor happens. Giving that social account only your Friday can be your thing to work on as it is necessary.
  3. Admitting that you are a victim is a fortfying ideal. You see, digital world bring the possibilities of anything through a simple screen, or a simple anything. And that is an immense opportunity. Victims of the digital world are increasingly out of their intention. Admitting that you are a victim instead of benefiary is enlightening.
  4. Addiction can be addiction on anything. Understanding that is key to unlocking much including your chances to see that you are drowning in digital addicted.
  5. You can create ghost accounts for advertising and make no friends online. When new things show up they create an illusion that old things no longer work and old friendship can’t save us. This is not good for us.
  6. The slower return to innocence.Try to get yourself into wasting time on less harmful content that on very harmful content. Once less harmful content becomes your thing. You then try to waste your time on productivity stuff than on less ahrmful content.
  7. Digital desertification can starve your addiction. Try to spend months or a year withouts gadgets you love the most. It can help. You can also delete accounts.
  8. Don’t try what you haven’t tried. I repeat! Don’t try what you haven’t tried!
  9. Devine speration is for those who can afford. If resources can allow, compartmentalisation of your digital resources is ideal. You can have a smartphone for social networking to play that part alone while another smartphone is for productive issues. A room can be for gaming and stuff and stuff. It can free up your tools from being both but to be either productive or otherwise.

Not curing and preventing digital addiction and simply benefit from it.

You can get paid through an addiction. That’s the good part. Find means to sell the products of your addiction. Artists are addicted to their art and they sell it. An addicted gamer is likely to be the one who can be the industry’s most credible commentary.

That smartphone or whatever is not going to cease to be your companion. You cannot change this fact.

All you can do is to stay in the positive. You can join social networks and platforms that can enhance you instead of ruining you. You can learn something when you answer a question on quora than when you post a nice selfie.

Download those productivity apps and give them personal use. Be emotionally attached because if you don’t you will still revert back to where you came from. Emotional attachment is why we are addicted to those sites and gadgets we are addicted to. Digital addiction is not bad because we can use it to achieve greater things in life.

If you believe in the digital world you must defend the fragment of the digital world you believe in and save your world through it. You are more efficient than one who is without. Be efficient.

How to avoid toxic words and win a tension-free relationship

I have been with avoiding toxic words before they create tension for months before August 2021. Then I tuned in to the radio on the 18th of August 2021. There a presenter gave a situation and and question for listeners to answer. Your partner breaks your phone when it’s needed the most; when the biggest deal is about to happen through it. You are in any public space filled with professionals. You shout at him/her.

One stranger who is to your partner is of an opposite sex steps in and gives straight cash and your partner takes it. The stranger says clean words before departure and toss a business card to your partner: “In case it’s not enough I can help.”

All this appear as if the stranger has just said to your partner buy this noisemaker the lost toy. What can be your response?

  1. When things go wrong think first before you may correct them.

Between when things go wrong and when you intervene is usually a small window, and the window is small by default. Don’t change the size of that window. Be fast in making your mouth talk in the most smarter way you can achieve. Quickly think the things to say, the examples to pick and the “do you still remembers” to put in. After that think of how best to say them.

In the broken phone situation above, your partner did what was bad. You responded badly. Your partner then responded worst. If you allow it to keep going that way worst can make a nemesis.

Quickly getting to talk is not wrong, losing what to talk is. In his book Blink : The Power of Thinking Without Thinking  Gladwell argued, they are times when haste don’t make waste.

  1. We sometimes build a confrontational relationship to prove who is the boss. It’s wrong.

When none between the two is up to suggesting but charging things. A simple word can result into another which only turns into another. It’s all about proving who is the boss.

When one fails to win s/he waits for another cycle to start and make sure that s/he will be on top of the game when the climax hits in. It is hard to avoid toxic words in such a setup. Before you make it to your partner expressing your wish to end confrontational conservation and actions reverse first out of them.

  1. Find your way out not your way in.

That time you see yourself as already tension and as already causing one is key. Pull out when you think that you are marching into that territory. You are for each other, so let each other be for you. Normally is satisfies to be in the right side or to prove that your on the right. But when you are in love, you must be a loser for the sake of your winning relationship.

  1. Know your biggest source of conflict and discuss it.

Discuss it fearlessly alone or with a mediator involved. Just knowing that when things go this way, this is how fast I may need to go helps. Also have the courage to have yourself not your partner the causation of the conflict.

  1. Don’t revenge, solve.

This is a smarter people approach and we are all smart people. Smarter people don’t seek revenge, they seek a way forward. Smarter people see a crisis as an inspiration. To them vengeance doesn’t quite get to recover what’s lost. They recover what’s lost by creating new things, new bigger things.

  1. Talk when you are in good shape

Wait for your cooling down. Be in the best version of the plain you before you can talk when you need to talk or even settle things out. Healing what’s wounded takes sympathy. Sympathy is welcome to the best version of you than the bad version of you.

I believe a storm can not solve anything by remaining a storm. It must calm down into clear skies to be something that can mean repair than harm. Of course, beer is not a behaviour but you don’t wait for the time you are drunk. You can’t talk about it just when you are in anger about it.

  1. Know if it can make any difference to talk about it.

May be it is a reading room. Your partner walks in and talk while you are concentrating. His/her stay is just for a minute. Does rebuking him/her make any difference? 

We are ready to talk even when it is not necessary and it is not good. There are expectations when they are not met, we are not somewhere we are in love and tolerating the missed expectations is not bad.

  1. Find ways to communicate your expectations.

May be your wish is to find the both of you home before 7pm and you know that’s possible. Communicating an expectation (the wish) is “I am passing through your workplace and I will fetch you home”. To communicate is not to do it the other way round. Because it is you finding ways to have your partner home at 7, you can always try another route as each day demands until your partner understands.

Sometimes it takes your transparency to communicate an expectation. In most of the time it takes just communicating an expectation and never breaking what you expect from your partner.

  1. Don’t hate yourself or feel hated

Because you can drown anyone into that hate and end reaping a magnified suffering. Probably a person in peace with himself or herself is a good source of words that sparkles.

Don’t look into yourself and see terror you can’t freeze, darkness and failure of the past and rejection.

What is patience? This is how to kill confidence and take charge of your success story.

What is patience

Confidence seeks dominance. Persistence may be your will. Patience is bought.

To be persistent is to keep coming back. Patience gets you to be attending no matter what and it seems to be the opposite of confidence to me. Patience is when the time lost in trying to achieve something is not even regretted. Because it’s you at it in your very meek sense. You let the situation treat you badly for what you wanna achieve. While patience seeks a winning end and doesn’t care when and how badly the end can come, confidence seeks dominance. Confidence is about shortening the game.

A Merriam-Webster Collegiate Thesaurus definition “the power or capacity to endure without complaint something difficult or disagreeable” nailed it. Patience is the biggest power you may need to achieve something. Through patience, you can only have the privilege to like the unlikeable, which is ultimately a thing to set you apart. Through patience, you’re in the capacity to endure.

Related: Discipline is doing the right things at the right time, good things the wrong way

In a Christian setting, endurance is taken as a dose to persecution. Persecutuion is an enemy to any existing religion yet enduring it strengthens the persecuted. The reward ahead, therefore the purpose behind being in something else is the only thing that buys patience.

The fisherman’s desire to catch characterises his patience.

The fisherman’s desire to catch characterises his patience, and his patience in wating charectrises his desire to catch.

~SubjectMe (Personal Diary) 2020, Oct

He doesn’t desire to cath without being patient. When he doesire he is filled with that feeling of wanting to (catch). In fact, his point of satisfaction is written in his mind before his first toss of the bait into the waters. He must work towards it to achieve it. He doesn’t have it. He must find the right means to have it. Patience becomes one of the means a fisherman utilises to catch.

When there is less fish in the river. The river requires more patience from the fisherman.

A river flowing just close to my rural home is abused by the fisherman who use blasting cables then mosquito net to catch fish. Apparently these two models of fish robs from the river the summer broodstock that is supposed to make the next generation of fish species in the river, and cables kills all int the reach of its radius of death by causing the lung to burst. More to these unethical fishing practises are the population increase in the area that was also increased by immigrants and refugees.

The narration short. The orthodoxy fisherman has been plumating because the river is no longer rewarding and no one wishes to save it.

“It now takes sixty times more wait that it used to take in the old days to finally be able to catch something”, one fisherman told me as I inquired about the river in the pre-mid-1990s.

When your dream is big and its outcome a thing for the very few, you must be patient. Patience required obviously is more that before.

Patience at work and confidence at work: Hopeful losers and confident losers.

A hopeful loser is powered by patience. When she loses she can argue “my chance is not now”. For delayed is not taken away.There is nothing made yet, there is no dream yet true but her main purpose is a reward ahead.

When you are a hopeful loser you don’t doubt your tomorrow, your next move and your finishing line. Eachb time you lose you find more means out of such a lose to eventually get you to a win.

Patience at work. Confidence at work. Hopeful losers and confident losers.

A confident loser can do this: Give up, go on to do this and give up again while entirely confident. Sometimes confidence can’t build when it fails to make a win in the first attmpt. Confidence is blind.

It is the last thing to get one to be emotionally attached to what he’s doing.

The motivating 25: blogs on inspiration, creativity, habits, happiness, financial freedom and entrepreneurship.

This is just a list and it’s not ranked. Some motivation, inspiration or self-help blogs can not be on the list or were left out because they include other niches. A good example is Lifehacker. It is a good place to get some inspiration content but I simply left it out for being multi-niche-ish. Motivationgrid.com, a great site, could have made it to the list but it failed because it last posted new articles in 2019.

To have the list appear fair, I also wanted to pick one or two from Africa (South Africa, Nigeria and mostly former British colonies), New Zealand, Oz and India (which I did), but I found nothing from Africa, except multi-niche-ish. Laminita Savic’s purposefairy.com got a nice ticket as a Balkan inspiration blog in English, and it does more than great. With all that said list could have been closed at twenty, but an urge to add five more was massive. By decision, classy blogs that utilises the f-word were left behind.

1. mscareergirl.com by Nicole Crimaldi

This is a safe place for womankind. Nicole started a part-time job, and blogging was one thing he could try to do before going for her work. A woman deserves a special home in any field, to have her be considered as history failed to be kind to her, and it’s here where you can expect good career advice and self-finance management.

MSC are now a small team, a family or a shedom. And they’re writing a lot. Their territory now includes Medium.

2. jamesclear.com by James Clear (The Author of Atomic Habits)

It’s like a whole Udemy on creativity, self-help and motivation and it is the best you can expect from such an expert. His email arsenal comes in the best package, and it tempts you to end up in a browser tab very early in the morning, to be inspired earlier like the birds of the sky that shout loud at that time of the day.

3. visualsynopsis.com by Dani Savaker (this is a very unique approach in the field)

After reading a book in the category of self-help, personal development, inspiration, happiness, personal finance, etc., you can be lucky to encounter a well-illustrated info diagram explaining that book in the most informing summary in the history of summaries. Use it now to discover books you haven’t read because authors like Tim Leberecht have reasons to come to her before or soon after publishing so that she can capture all between two covers in an artistic touch that beats what we casually know as an infographic.

As we’re done with this pure artist, she’s yours to follow on Pinterest.

4. motiversity.com

When motivation comes through videos it is impactful. Great is watching Jai White in the gym for two seconds then a marathon athlete on the journey, etc., when the underlining fact is Tony Robbins’ voice shouting “resourcefulness” as the jacket to put on when the lack of resources is the cold biting you.

Motiversity’s YouTube channel is open for subscriptions.

5. tinybuddha.com by Lori Deschene (Author of Tiny Buddha: Simple Wisdom For Life Is Hard)

If this was a ranking for sites focusing on the pursuit of happiness, Tiny Buddha would have made it to number one. Happiness is not a thing you can find all of a sudden because it’s not a commodity or the air you breathe or the income you make. Here is a site to help with achieving a state that is happiness.

They do have a lot of articles, a lot of quotes including Tiny Buddha’s own, then desktop wallpapers with motivating massages and a perfect email arsenal.

6. purposefairy.com by Laminita Savic (The author of 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy)

At my first glance, I concluded that this is a blog with a very calm Christian message. It’s no longer a one-author blog as Tiny Buddha is now. Spirituality, happiness and finding happiness are what you will get.

7. mrmoneymustache.com by Mr Money Mustache/ Peter Jonathan Adeney

 Were you lucky to watch the box office flop, A million ways to die in the west? If you were, you may get a sense of what money and moustache meant when together on one person. But, since he was born in Canada, Mr Money Mustache is not the kind of a guy who takes. He can help you to get your “financial freedom” only “through badassity.”

8. becomingminimalist.com by Joshua Becker (Author of The More Of Less)

They deserve a million views, for sure. The idea is, sometimes in life, if not all the times, “when things aren’t adding up in your life [you must] start subtracting them”. Through them, I discovered minimalism and then I taught myself that, When you plan to be greedy, try balancing your lust with starving yourself always.

I love this site.

9. Motivation.com by Jeff Busche and two other founders

Jeff Busche is said to have become “a pioneer in the infancy of procuring domain names”, so it is not strange that their blog is motivation.com. Between the domain name bubble, three founders (who had more to write but created other blogs for that stuff to keep the motivation site cool) and now is a lot to read in chapters like parenting, career, relationships, passion, purpose and leadership.

10. Impossiblehq.com/blog by Joel Runyon

Joel’s story was impossible from the start as it started to happen in the banks of the 2008 global crisis. But he founded a six-figure company and visited a lot of destinations as he had hoped. The purpose of his blog is to push readers into extremes. Difficult isn’t impossible.

11. Artofmanliness.com by Brett McKay (Co-author of The Art of Manliness: Classic Skills and Manners For The Modern Man)

To have what you are less toxic to what you are and others around, I wrote in my diary, be what you are, and fail to believe that you’re superior to one who isn’t what you are. More than 3500 articles as of July 12, 2021. This blog will take a man into a better husband not a “roommate” to a wife, a man who isn’t damaged by toxic masculinity.

Workout as a category is not left outside.

12. Bakadesuyo.com by Eric Barker (Author of Barking up the wrong tree)

Idiot!!! I am not saying you’re an idiot. Idiot is what bakadesuyo means. And it’s there to tell you that the thing you need is to be working on your definition of success.

An extensive archive of articles and a lot of work put on makes this blog great.

13. Tonyrobbins.com/blog by Tony Robbins (Author of Awakening The Giant Within)

The list of articles may not be extensive as what you are likely to have as artofmanliness or very extensive as tinybuddha’s but Tony is a massive life coach. He podcasts, too.

14. Marieforleo.com by Marie Forleo (Author of Everything Is Figureoutable: Marie’s Supersoul Session)

Podcasts, interviews and articles. She knows how to introduce herself and her ideas to you without offending you and this is a goodie in podcasts. Everything she says is clean and smart, the result is always a message that can move you. Plus between 23 and the current 45 years after her birth is nothing but a life coaching experience, studies and books written.

15. Daniellelaporte.com (Author of The Desire Map Experience: A Guide to Creating Goals with Soul)

In her about section, we’re informed that Forbes took hers as “one of the top 100 blogs for women”. She deserves a lot.

If you wanna truly be cared then be ready to care. If you wanna speak from the heart or have your heart fixed or strengthened, this is for you. In this zenith of inspiration where you can get inspired through a dozen ways. There is a podcast for you.

16. Gretchenrubin.com by Gretchen Rubin (Author/Creator of Four Tendencies

She’s a featured speaker and, as Mario, she made stunning achievements in the industry. Her four tendencies explore happiness and great habits. A very active blog, a weekly podcast, Happiness with Gretchen Rubin is more than an inspiration to find your happiness.

17. Simonarich.com by Simona Rich (Author of Palmistry [With Celebrity Palm Examples])

Born in Lithuania where she would grow up a daughter to an abusive father and a caring mother, moved to the UK for her tertiary studies and finally India after all that. Such a journey in life awarded readers online one great blogger. Her presence in the home of yoga, Hinduism and Buddhism, helped in creating a blogger who doesn’t leave any culture and religion behind. Besides, you can get a bigger perspective in life if your inspiration comes from the whole globe.

Including her personal diary, she built a lot of self-help material, Christianity, Hinduism and Buddhism, meditations, inspiration, culture, mindfulness and self-healing but some on yoga, Taoism, minimalism, abundance and abundance theosophy.

18. positiveprovocations.com by Zeenat Merchant-Syal

India’s well-known blogger. Zeenat is no small name in the counselling industry and there’s a degree in Counseling and Motivational Psychology behind her talent.

Material on her blog is technical stuff you only have to take heed, it will fix a lot of the problems behind the coils of your moving life. But when articles are not enough, you can enter her email, instant chat, and Skype zone after paying forward anything between 18USD and 45USD. Half an hour per session is enough and it saves you fuel or money to take yourself to a physical counsellor.

19. actspot.com by Actspot

They provide courses online on communication skills, time management, selling skills, self-development, leadership and creativity.

Blog articles written between 2009 and 2021 June counts to 718, while 345 of them were written in 2010 alone.

20 jackkornfield.com Jack Hornfield (Author of A Parth With A Heart: A Guide through the perils and promises with spiritual life)

Jack is a Buddhist monk, a founder at Spirit Rock Meditation Center in Woodacre California, great at speaking and writing into the reader’s deep downs. There is no longer a need to repeat that his writing skill is a foundation to the industry he presents. He’s also the usherer of the Vipassana movement in America. Vipassana is one of the earliest forms of meditations, and the term means to see things as they are in their make (you can follow this link to know more).

Clarity, loving-kindness, honest development of the wise heart and mindfulness are among the topics Jack writes and podcasts in.

21 zenhabits.com by Leo Babauta (Author of The Power of Less)

The oldest article on the site is dated 09 January 2009. Years immediately after 09 January, that’s when Leo used to write a lot. 2 000 000 readers is a crown a leader in the industry of inspiration like zenhabits.com deserves.

In my blogging journey, zenhabits is the first to tell me that I should do content, content, content instead of 33,3% content and two-thirds marketing and chasing after dollars.

22 Stevenaitchison.co.uk by Steven Aitchison (Author of the Belief System)

Growth, lifestyle, relationship, health, spirituality and business. Just that! A Heathrow blog in the British inspiration ways. His message takes a soft approach and, when there is a need, he puts himself in meekly. Steven didn’t waste time building his about page in making such a good blog to follow.

23 chrisguillebeau.com by Chris Guillebeau (Author of The Art of Non-Conformity)

Non-conformity, to him, is “lack of orthodoxy in thoughts or beliefs” or “the refusal to accept established customs, attitudes, or ideas.”

Call him an Alchemist in this industry. He managed to be in every country on this planet, so he’s a big inspiration when you love travelling and adventuring. He also lost even more of his ink writing in areas like personal development, life-planning and entrepreneurship. His was of seeing things: $100 can make a startup, and for sure here at Informativus we started off one or two $100’s.

24 kevinbiggar.co.nz by Kevin Biggar

It’s not his blog that is finding a place on this list but him. He helps people to face challenges, and he is an any-stage motivational speaker. Except for several inspiring articles, his blog is not with much but he can be hired.

25 marcdussault.com by Marc Dussault

You expect to be told “to think like a champion” and “to perform like a champion”, when you’re messing into a blog of a three-time and one-time squash silver and squash gold medalist, respectively. From getting to do the best to get best grades to the definition of a term he invented [antimimeticisomorphism] the collection of articles there is massive.

Again, this is technical stuff from a growth strategist by a man in a variety of what he is and it can get someone to breakthrough in business.